IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #6022
Question:
People rely on cars to commute to work. If the use of cars is unlimited, what problems does it cause? To reduce the problems, should we discourage people from using cars?
Answer 1
Undoubtedly, cars have been a typical means of transportation for people while traveling to their work premises...

The blockage of highways is a significant problem if a colossal number of cabs accommodate the roads...

Notwithstanding the solutions, discouraging travelers from cab usage can be overwhelmingly beneficial...

In conclusion, I have a firm conviction that although more usage of private cabbies can pave the way for extreme traffic and affect the environment, it can be ameliorated through public awareness to limit car utilization...
Band: 6.5
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Answer 2
Nowadays, residents prefer driving cars to work. In my opinion, I suppose that this phenomenon causes a significant number of problems...

There are many disadvantages to using too many cars. First, people driving cars to work can contribute to traffic congestion, especially in a big city...

To solve these matters, some people suggest that the government should impose strict restrictions on the use of cars, but I do not think this is an effective option...

In conclusion, I think that while discouraging car use might seem a quick solution to many problems related to the environment and the traffic system currently facing society, it is most unlikely to be a permanent cure...
Band: 6
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Answer 3
Many people often have to travel long distances to go to work. This essay will point out that, given that the use of vehicles is out of control, it would cause environmental and traffic problems...

With the unconstrained use of cars, pollution, and traffic jams would occur. First, we must understand that no matter whether a vehicle uses gasoline, electricity, or hybrid form, with today's technology, pollutants will be formed while producing or consuming energy...

On the other hand, the city areas, the commuters' destinations every morning, would be jammed by automobiles...

To tackle the consequences, people should think of alternatives. For example, public transport would help in reducing the number of vehicles on roads...

Although we all agree that some commuters cannot go to work without driving, people should be discouraged from using cars...
Band: 5.5
Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words30014448%
Top 300 Words172 (57%)60 (41%)34%
300 - 1000 Words54 (18%)34 (23%)62%
Over 1000 Words74 (24%)50 (34%)67%
Other Comments (kinoko)
Link Words: 13 (including link phrase: 0)
Sentences: Number: 15; Average Length: 116 characters; Words/Sentence: 20
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has would(7), that(6), cars(6), people(5), and(5), for(5), use(4); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
Task Response:
-You need to put forward more reasons why you agree with the statement; the essay doesn't need any solution to address the issue.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-The response is organized into paragraphs, but the focus of each is not always clear.
Lexical Resources:
-Lexis is mainly appropriate for the task, though there are some errors in word choice.