Some parents spend a little free time with their children today

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers
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 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #6057
Question:
Some parents spend a little free time with their children today. Why is this? Who do you think this affects more, parents or children?
Answer 1
When it is about raising their children, one of the biggest problems that many parents have is that they don't spend enough free time with their kids, probably due to extended work hours or the way that some modern parents believe is correct to raise their kids...

Firstly, it is vital to consider the possible reasons that trigger this problem. As I have mentioned, the lack of time due to long work hours and how some kids are raised could be two...

Additionally, while it is true that parents and children could be significantly affected by this, kids tend to be emotionally more affected than their parents...

In conclusion, childhood is a critical stage for human beings, spending more time with our children implies to be in contact with them properly, since that parent-child time helps kids to develop a pleasant personality and to feel emotionally stable...
Band: 6.5
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words32915045%
Top 300 Words192 (58%)62 (41%)32%
300 - 1000 Words46 (13%)32 (21%)69%
Over 1000 Words91 (27%)56 (37%)61%
Other Comments (diana)
Link Words: 27 (including link phrase: 5)
Sentences: Number: 11; Average Length: 174 characters; Words/Sentence: 29
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-The introduction seems long, refine sentences.
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has their(10), parents(9), and(9), that(8), they(7), time(7), kids(7); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
Answer 2
Some parents nowadays spend little free time with their children for many reasons. Some of these reasons are valid, and parents don't have much choice...

One of the prominent reasons there's less free time is parents' workload. We live in a rat race world, and the majority of the population belongs to the middle or lower classes...

Another reason is teenage pregnancy, which is rampant in today's society. These teens are not mature enough to handle the responsibilities of parenthood, thus resulting in neglect of their children...

Parents are indeed vital in the development of children. They serve as the root of one's growth and being...

In conclusion, some parents prioritize money and solving stressful situations over spending time with their children...
Band: 6.5
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