Art classes, such as painting or drawing, are as important for children's development as other subjects, so they should be compulsory in high school. Do you agree?

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers Let me try to write.
 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #6606
Question:
Art classes, such as painting or drawing, are as important for children's development as other subjects, so they should be compulsory in high school. Do you agree or disagree?
Answer Hints:
You should agree with the statement. If you choose the reverse side, you will easily let the raters dislike your points and views. It'll hurt your chance to shoot a high score.

Agree
  • Art and music are also academic lessons, just presented in different ways.
  • Art and music education fosters creativity.
  • Art and music create ways to express oneself emotionally and intellectually.
  • Art and music enhance cognitive development from memory to spatial reasoning.
  • Art and music help social and emotional development, like teamwork and communication.
Disagree
  • More people have to work for everyday life, not just art and music; academic lessons are more useful for them.
  • School time is limited, and art and music education means trading off academic lessons, which is not fair for students who need the latter.
  • Some art and music arguments don't have widely acceptable conclusions, and schools or teachers may mislead students.
Answer 1
Many think that art and music education are essential components of a well-rounded secondary school curriculum...

Firstly, art and music education fosters creativity and self-expression. Through visual arts, such as drawing, painting, and sculpture, students learn to explore and communicate their thoughts, feelings, and ideas in unique and innovative ways...

Secondly, art and music education enhance cognitive development and academic performance. Research has shown that engagement in arts and music education is associated with improved cognitive skills, including enhanced memory, attention, and spatial reasoning...

Lastly, art and music education contribute to social and emotional development. Collaborative activities, such as group performances and art projects, promote teamwork, communication, and interpersonal skills, preparing students for success in the workplace and society...

In conclusion, art and music education are vital components of a comprehensive secondary school curriculum, offering numerous benefits that contribute to students' intellectual, emotional, social, and cultural development...
Band: 7
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words28814751%
Top 300 Words104 (36%)33 (22%)31%
300 - 1000 Words58 (20%)26 (17%)44%
Over 1000 Words126 (43%)88 (59%)69%
Other Comments (billriggs)
Link Words: 42 (including link phrase: 2)
Sentences: Number: 13; Average Length: 163 characters; Words/Sentence: 22
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(30), music(10), art(8), students(8), education(7), that(5), their(5); try to decrease duplicated words.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
-Suggest refining coherence and cohesion by removing wordy linking words.