In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by international fast foods

IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers Let me try to write.
 IELTS Academic Essay Answers - #7025
Question:
In many countries, traditional foods are being replaced by international fast foods. This is having a negative effect on both families and societies. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?
Answer 1
The popularity of fast food is increasingly becoming the focus of local and global citizens' concerns due to its impact on individuals and society...

The opponents of fast food often point out that processed food substitutes traditional cooking meals and kills certain national cocking habits, eventually leading to the loss of diversity in specific cuisine and ruining people's eating habits and health...

Nevertheless, considering some negative details listed above, the widespread popularity of fast food products has countless benefits for individuals and the country's economy...

In conclusion, despite some tangible drawbacks of eating fast-foot products on an individual's health and relationships, it has both social and economic positive influence, as it stimulates the economy to grow and, at the same time, provides more time and opportunity for ordinary employees...
Band: 6.5
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words34018554%
Top 300 Words149 (43%)41 (22%)27%
300 - 1000 Words55 (16%)42 (22%)76%
Over 1000 Words136 (40%)102 (55%)75%
Other Comments (farid)
Link Words: 40 (including link phrase: 5)
Sentences: Number: 11; Average Length: 204 characters; Words/Sentence: 30
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(23), their(8), food(6), for(6), fast(5), time(5), individuals(4); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
-Suggest refining coherence and cohesion by removing wordy linking words.
Task Response:
-The main ideas are relevant but a little off-topic. You should focus on the 'negative effect' and agree or disagree.
Coherence and Cohesion:
-Ideas are generally arranged coherently, and there is a clear overall progression.
Lexical Resources:
-The range of vocabulary is quite broad and shows awareness of collocation, but there are a few word choice errors.
Grammar Range and Accuracy:
-There is a mix of simple and complex sentence forms.
Answer 2
Food habits of human beings are changing day by day in most countries we could observe this trend in recent years...

Firstly, the economic development of a country mainly depends on the primary sector like agriculture...

In addition to this, these modern food practices also will create several health problems among our children...

In conclusion, we must say that we must preserve our traditions, including food, habits, customs, language, etc...
Band: 6.5
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Answer 3
It has already been replaced by some traditional food by international junk food brands in some nations nowadays...

As societies develop, more and more international organizations open convenient restaurants outside their countries to gain more profits...

Firstly, fast food is unhealthier, and most of it involves a considerable amount of sugar and fat, which are harmful to our body and brain...

Secondly, our traditional food cooking industries will be hit dramatically if people purchase fast food as their daily meals...

In conclusion, we can accept this new and trending fast food as part of our lifestyle choices. But, on the other hand, we also have to protect our culture of traditional foods and avoid consuming a proportion of unhealthy fast food to keep fit...
Band: 6.5
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