Earlier, people wore clothes that were related to their traditions
IELTS Writing Task 2 (Essay): Hints and Sample Answers
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Some parents give their children everything they ask for or allow them to do whatever they want. The government should protect culture. Therefore, some people believe that new buildings should be built in traditional styles. To be successful in sport, some people believe it is essential to have a good coach. Others say that an athlete's natural ability is more important. Today, more and more people are traveling to untouched, unexplored natural places. What are the advantages and disadvantages for individuals and the country?| IELTS General Essay Answers - #6835 |
Question:
Earlier, people wore clothes that were related to their traditions. But now, people wear the same type of clothes worldwide. Is this a positive development or a negative development?
Earlier, people wore clothes that were related to their traditions. But now, people wear the same type of clothes worldwide. Is this a positive development or a negative development?
Answer 1
It is irrefutable that clothes represented people's culture and religion during the ancient days; however, nowadays, people like to wear similar clothes around the globe...
Undoubtedly, there is an umpteen number of brighter sides of Western clothes for folks. First and foremost, people are living in the contemporary era, where all individuals like to wear similar types of attire...
Admittedly, wearing traditional clothes, people do not do work in particular places such as offices, mines, and factories because every workplace has its discipline and requirements...
By contrast, those who say that traditional attire is more worthwhile for demos and their religion...
To conclude, there is no doubt the merits of modern dress overshadow as to compare ethnic wear, but it has a detrimental impact on culture and religion...
Undoubtedly, there is an umpteen number of brighter sides of Western clothes for folks. First and foremost, people are living in the contemporary era, where all individuals like to wear similar types of attire...
Admittedly, wearing traditional clothes, people do not do work in particular places such as offices, mines, and factories because every workplace has its discipline and requirements...
By contrast, those who say that traditional attire is more worthwhile for demos and their religion...
To conclude, there is no doubt the merits of modern dress overshadow as to compare ethnic wear, but it has a detrimental impact on culture and religion...
Band: 6.5
Word Statistics
| Group | Word Number | Distinct | Percent |
|---|---|---|---|
| All Words | 411 | 178 | 43% |
| Top 300 Words | 190 (46%) | 55 (30%) | 28% |
| 300 - 1000 Words | 101 (24%) | 44 (24%) | 43% |
| Over 1000 Words | 120 (29%) | 79 (44%) | 65% |
Other Comments (jarry)
Link Words: 39 (including link phrase: 4)
Sentences: Number: 22; Average Length: 117 characters; Words/Sentence: 18
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-The essay is too long, try to shrink it.
-The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(18), clothes(13), wear(9), for(9), that(8), they(8), people(7); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
-Suggest refining coherence and cohesion by removing wordy linking words.
IELTS Essay Format:
-The essay is too long, try to shrink it.
-The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(18), clothes(13), wear(9), for(9), that(8), they(8), people(7); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.
-Suggest refining coherence and cohesion by removing wordy linking words.