Some people become famous at an early age. Is it bad or good? Discuss and give your opinion.
Vocab: Celebrity

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 IELTS General Essay Answers - #6839
Question:
Some people become famous at an early age. Is it bad or good? Discuss and give your opinion.
Answer 1
Nowadays everyone wants to be popular, and the youngster is no exception. Some people believe that contemporary technology provides a platform for juveniles to become famous at an early age...

Undoubtedly, young people are living in the era of the internet, and they can easily find fame in the virtual world...

By contrast, those who say that fame plays an indispensable role in the early adolescent phase. Some people argue that it is a matter of the dignity of a celebrity and his family...

In my ideology, both perspectives have their pros and cons, but it is the onus of famous people to give a positive message to their followers...

To conclude, the negative side is more than the brighter side of becoming an eminent person in the initial stage of life, but celebs must give valuable knowledge to the youngster...
Band: 6.5
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Word Statistics
GroupWord NumberDistinctPercent
All Words48621544%
Top 300 Words261 (53%)69 (32%)26%
300 - 1000 Words88 (18%)48 (22%)54%
Over 1000 Words137 (28%)98 (45%)71%
Other Comments (jarry)
Link Words: 32 (including link phrase: 1)
Sentences: Number: 25; Average Length: 112 characters; Words/Sentence: 19
Suggestions:
IELTS Essay Format:
-The essay is too long, try to shrink it.
-The conclusion is too simple, rewrite to summarize your points.
-You should avoid using common words repeatedly, and show your grammatical range and accuracy as possible. The essay has and(15), people(11), they(10), their(10), for(7), that(6), famous(5); try to decrease duplicated words.
-High-ratio basic sight words may degrade your writing; suggest rephrasing some.
-Suggest using a few rare or uncommon words to demonstrate your vocabulary range and level.